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How are you treating others?

This section has some ideas on how to change harmful behaviour. Reading this could be a first step towards seeing how your behaviour might be affecting others.

People who do sexually harmful stuff can come from any culture, any sort of home and have any sort of relationship with the people they are hurting. What they have in common is that they are doing something terribly wrong. If you’re committing sexual violenceSexual Violence
Is a general term that covers any sexual stuff a person does not consent to.
it is really important that you get help.

Here’s what to do:

Stop and Think

Stop before you start

Did you know?

There is never any reason why someone HAS to do something sexual with anyone else.

The people who are brave enough to admit that what they’re doing (or have done) is not OK and get help are the ones who find a way out and a better life. If you have not hurt someone sexually but think you might, you have the opportunity to stop before you start.

Take some time to calmly think about the consequences. Think about the consequences for other people including your friends and family. Imagine how tough it would be on them knowing you hurt someone – they may struggle with continuing to love or support you.

Think about the effects it could have on the person you hurt.



Want to stop hurting others?

What about if you’re already sexually harming others?

Most importantly, think of the person you are hurting. Read about the effects of sexual violence and ask yourself if you really want to put someone through that. Perhaps bad stuff has happened to you. Think about whether you would want other people to suffer the same way you have.


Avoid losing stuff or people you love

If you don’t stop being sexually violent, you could go to jail or be taken away from people you love, or lose friendships. You will probably also experience feelings of guilt and shame which could last for many years. Finally remember to think about the good things in your life, and about your hopes and dreams for the future. Thinking this way may help to stop you from harming others.

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Where to get help:

If you need help, talking to a trained professional can be really useful. While you might feel ashamed, you’re actually being a lot braver by talking to someone about it rather than hiding. If it prevents any sexual violenceSexual Violence
Is a general term that covers any sexual stuff a person does not consent to.
, then it’s gotta be worth it.

Did you know?

ConsentConsent
Is a free agreement between everyone involved in any sexual experience. A free agreement can not happen when someone is verbally, physically or emotionally forced or threatened, tricked, if someone is too wasted on drugs or alcohol or if they are under the age of 16. A free agreement means that everyone was keen on everything that was happening and they all knew what was going on.
means more than just permission. Learn more about consent.

These organisations can help you if you are in danger of doing sexual violenceSexual Violence
Is a general term that covers any sexual stuff a person does not consent to.
and you can call them yourself, anonymouslyAnonymously
Without telling your name or any personal details.
if you want to.

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Welcome

Come on in to the Sex’N’Respect website!

Just a heads up, this website has some stuff about sexual violence which might be upsetting,
especially if you or someone close to you has experienced it.

If you find yourself getting upset, make sure you get support or take a few deep breaths
and think about something that makes you smile.

Some of the topics in here may also conflict with your beliefs.
We think that if a person is harming someone, or their human rights
IT IS NOT OK - no matter what your beliefs are.

Sweet As